Many husbands can say their wives are sweet, but I think I am the only one who can prove it day in and day out. Yep, my wife is sweet, but it’s in her nature, so I get to swaddle myself in it each day.
My wife doesn’t have a mean, hating, unkind bone in her body. This is the genesis of her sweetness. Whether her parents raised her this way, she developed it as a middle child or my charm brings it out, I don’t question. What I do is avoid taking advantage of it as I did earlier in my marriage. It’s akin to sneaking 12 items in the 10 items or less line. I’ll readily admit that early in our marriage I stole my honey’s sweetness. And the funny thing is she didn’t care, call me on it or demand reperations. She’s just that sweet.
Her sweetness is best exemplified by two examples. One happens on a daily basis, while the other is monumental in its sugary sweetness quotient.
On a daily basis you can almost count on two things happening: 1) I will go to bed after my wife and 2) She will wake up before me. I am a night owl at heart and she isn’t. Sure, she tries to hang on the branch with me, but she’s more a robin. Early to bed and early to rise. Even when she does play night owl, she’s up early and ready to go. On those nights I go to bed after her I creep into the bedroom and turn on the light. Yes, I am one of those people. I need to make sure everything is there, I don’t trip over the clothers I’ve piled on the floor and adjust the crucial fan angle. She doesn’t mind. Sure, she wakes up sometimes, but as she explains, “I gotta pee.” Now, while I am slumbering she awakes. Sometimes she lays in bed reading quietly, other times she hustles out to her job. Regardless, she’s always up at least an hour before me. God love her, she doesn’t turn the light on, and before she exits the room, she gently, slowly and silently closes the curtains to shun the sunlight from my eyes. It’s her sweet nature, her loving spirit that does this.
With that example given you must be wondering what the number one sweetness thing can be. I mean, if she does so much that is sweet it’s hard to find something that stands out, right? Hell, yes. After 20 years the sweetness no longer stands out on its own, but runs together as the mural of her way. It’s a gorgeous, glorious mural punctated by the bright spots designating her sweetness. Still, I can pull one of the spots off and show it to you. One of those spots burns brighter than the others and attracts you, draws you into it.
When I owned my own business I was the chief earner in the family. Ok, I was the only one. Working 80 hours a week, traveling across the midwest, juggling all the balls that come with your own business. In the course of this I made some bad decisions. Well, I made bad decisions before I started my own business and these led to serious problems with the business. In one week they seemed to syncronize and they crushed me. The seriousness of the problems cannot be understated, as I am sure in another universe I would end up in jail. In this universe, though, I had to explain to my wife how I let her down, how I tried to take the easy way and how I jepordized our family.
This all came out on a special night. I can tell you the exact day. It was May 23, 1994 and the final episode of Star Trek the Next Generation was debuting. The wife and I loved this series and never missed an episode. Instead of it being a happy night as we planned, I huddled in bed with her crying. It was simple and succinct, but the mistakes I admitted and the pressure I was facing were too much.
What did my wife do? She held me. She massaged me. She calmed me down and didn’t freak out. We talked, we held each other and pretty soon I settled down. She left the room and after a while I came out to find her. She stood there in the kitchen, two or three pans going I don’t remember exactly. My daughter had been put to bed and the dogs walked.
I was petrified. Did she not understand? Was she ignoring the precipice I had nudged us onto? Had she lost it and trying to occupy herself?
Nope.
As she told me, “We can’t do anything about it now. I wanted to make tonight nice for you so you would forget.”
Right there, folks, is sweetness embodied.
Today’s Gift: Literally, this will pale in comparison to her sweetness, but I’ve made arrangements to buy a small flashlight so that on those nights she goes to bed first I won’t turn on the light.